Why Emotional Intimacy in Marriage is so Hard

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Many people would agree that emotional intimacy is one of the most important aspects of a successful marriage. After all, it is emotional intimacy that allows couples to share their deepest feelings and vulnerabilities with each other.

However, emotional intimacy can be hard to maintain over time, especially when life gets busy or stressful. Here are five reasons why emotional intimacy in a marriage or committed relationship can be difficult to achieve and maintain:

5 Reasons Emotional Intimacy in a Marriage or Committed Relationship is so Hard

1. You’re carrying emotional baggage and resentment.

It’s common for couples to accumulate emotional baggage and resentment over time. This emotional baggage can manifest as a reluctance or inability to share emotional intimacy with each other.

Resentment is a particularly dangerous emotion when it comes to emotional intimacy in marriage. Resentment can breed bitterness and contempt, which are two of the deadliest enemies of a successful relationship.

If you find yourself struggling with emotional baggage and resentment, it’s important to address these issues head-on. Talk to your spouse about how you’re feeling, and work together to resolve any underlying issues.

2. You lack trust in one another.

Trust is another essential ingredient for emotional intimacy in marriage. If couples don’t trust each other, they’ll be less likely to open up emotionally.

Trust can be difficult to build and easy to lose. If your spouse has hurt you in the past, it can be difficult to trust them again. You may find yourself constantly watching what your spouse says and does, looking for any signs of betrayal.

If trust is an issue for you, it’s important to talk about it with your spouse. Be honest about your feelings and concerns, and work together to rebuild the trust that has been lost.

3. You have different levels of emotional intimacy.

Everyone experiences and expresses emotional intimacy differently. One person may feel comfortable sharing their deepest emotions with their spouse, while another may prefer to keep their feelings to themselves. This can be a difficult issue for couples to navigate, as it can be easy to misinterpret each other’s emotional needs.

If you’re not sure how your spouse is feeling, don’t bombard them with questions. Instead, try to create an environment where your spouse feels comfortable sharing their emotions with you.

4. You have a fear of rejection.

Many people are afraid of emotional intimacy because they fear rejection. They worry that their spouse will judge them or think less of them if they share their true feelings.

This fear of rejection can be especially strong in marriages that are struggling. If you’re feeling insecure in your marriage, it’s important to talk to your spouse about your fears. Only by communicating openly and honestly will you be able to overcome the fear of rejection and achieve emotional intimacy in your marriage.

5. There is a lack of communication.

One of the most common reasons emotional intimacy is so hard to achieve is a lack of communication. Couples who don’t communicate well with each other may have difficulty understanding each other’s emotional needs and desires.

If you’re having trouble communicating with your spouse or loved one, it’s important to seek help from a professional. A therapist or counselor can teach you how to communicate more effectively with each other, which will make it easier to achieve emotional intimacy in your marriage.

Final Thoughts

Emotional intimacy may seem like a daunting task, but it’s essential for a happy and successful marriage. If you’re struggling to achieve emotional intimacy in your marriage, don’t give up.

Keep communication open with your spouse or partner, and seek help from a professional if needed. With time and effort, you can overcome any obstacle in your way and create a deeper emotional bond with your spouse.

The counselors at Behavioral Health Clinic are eager to help you build a marriage and/or relationships with emotional intimacy. Contact us today to schedule your first appointment.

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